Talking Heads ~ Video phones ~ Skype

[BooksAdmin]

Talking Heads #7

"It occurred to me that nothing is more interesting than opinion when opinion is interesting..."
Herbert Bayard Swope, creator of the Op-Ed page.

A two week  forum for opinions on anything in print: magazines, newspaper articles, online: bring your ideas and let's discuss.

Our Seventh Selection is:      
Video phones ~ Skype
Why People Don't Like Video Chatting
Time: January 18, 2010



What is Skype? Why do we need it for every day communication? Yes it would be fun to see the grandchildren. What about everybody else you get emails from or communicate online with. What do you really  do when you talk on the phone?

 In this age of instantly knowing what celebrities are thinking backstage at the Oscars via Twitter and the immediacy of Chat on the Internet,  how much closeness in communication is too much? Do you really want to SEE the other person you're talking to, on the phone, or on the computer via SKYPE?


What do you think of some of the author's assertations:

That's because Skype breaks the century-old social contract of the phone: we pay close attention while we're talking and zone out while you are.

As soon as you begin to talk, I feel trapped and desperately scan the room for tasks I can do to justify the enormous waste of time that is your talking. I wash dishes, I file receipts, I read news sites, I make little fake suicide faces to my wife Cassandra about how much I want to hang up that cause her to yell "Joel, I need you now" in a really unconvincing way that I've asked her not to do, but I still can't stop making the suicide faces. In desperate times, when I am on my cell phone in the middle of nowhere, I will pace. The only other time I pace is when I stub a toe or burn myself. But when I start talking, I assume that you are sitting perfectly still, rapt. And while that is actually true when I'm talking, people aren't listening to those of you who haven't been on E!.

But Skype requires me to look at you while you're talking, which is totally ridiculous.

Read more: http://www.time.com/time/magazine/article/0,9171,1952314,00.html#ixzz0hQQn2C7X

Do YOU multi task while on the phone? And if not, why not? Have electronics changed our lives for better or worse? Are we more connected but at an arm's length?

How invasive is too invasive? What are you wearing right now? Would you be comfortable if we all could suddenly see each other typing here? Would you dress up for a SKYPE call?

Let's discuss this latest development to bring us closer, do we really want that?  

[ginny]

Are you in danger of being left behind in the....I don't even know what to call it, the electronic revolution? How many of you have ipods and the newest note pad things (note I don't know even what to call them), I know many have the electronic readers, but how about SKYPE?

Twitter, Facebook, we're getting used to the instant info of the world, the instant opinion,  but personally how has this affected you?

SKYPE apparently allows you to talk to another person while seeing them talking to you on the screen. It's a video phone. What's your reaction to the video phone??

'Fess up, do you multi task when talking? Put up the dishes? Thumb through a magazine? Even typing on the computer?

Read the hilarious quote by the author of this piece from Time Magazine and then ask yourself how far from your own experience he is?

Is there some truth in the idea that we always think people are hanging on our every word while we ourselves don't do the same when they call,  or do we?

Do we REALLY want the other person we're talking to, on the phone or here to see us?  Does it depend on who is calling? How about those pesky telemarketers (I bet THAT would be some kind of something to see, the telemarketer who has called). I bet it's a huge room full of people on phones.

What are you wearing,  for instance as we type this? If somehow magically we could all see who we're talking to would you want that? Would you get dressed  up just to talk on the phone?

You have to ask what it says about us as a people that we want to talk to each other but not necessarily SEE each other.

I can see there would be some benefits, grandchildren, soldiers overseas, but  are there any drawbacks? Let's discuss this new technology, do you yourself use SKYPE?

Let's discuss!

[maryz]

Sounds like fun, Ginny.  Do I Skype?  No - at least  not yet.  I do have a new laptop that has a camera, but I don't have a clue as to how to use it.

I do use my cell phone, still have a landline and answering machine.  But I've had texting blocked from our phones - we got too many wrong numbers that we had to pay for.  However, our grands text constantly, so who knows what'll happen to the phone next.

Soon, we'll have more computers than TVs in our house.  We do have a new flat-screen, HD TV.  We have fiberoptic connection for phone/TV/internet.  Our small back-room TV almost never gets turned on.  But by next week, we'll have a desktop and two laptop computers.   

[nlhome]

We don't use SKYPE, but we have done video conversations in another form. It's nice to see my daughter, who is too far away to visit often, in real time. We have neighbors who use it regularly to talk to their children who are far away. For that, it's great, but it requires advance preparation because of time zones, etc.

 My daughter and I,  we mostly talk on the phone. She calls while she is walking somewhere - all of my adult children do that. And sometimes I have to remind them that I am probably sitting at my work desk or making supper, but usually I am just grateful that they use this time to call ME. And we chat.

I multitask at work while on the phone, using an earpiece so I can pull a file or get a cup of coffee or jot a note, maybe find a web page. At home, I don't have the earpiece, so I end up bending my neck to hold the phone or doing things like unloading the dishwasher with one hand. My friends do the same thing.

I certainly wouldn't want people seeing me at my computer first thing in the morning!

We use Facebook and regular email. It's more convenient to email someone when I am thinking of them than to wait to call them at a time I think they might be available. We also text at times when a phone call would be intrusive. Our cell phones have free incoming, so that's at least half a savings!!

[Babi]

 Since I can no longer use a phone, this is sort of academic for me.
Back when I could use one, however, I definitely would not have wanted to be seen every time I talked to anyone. Dash to run a comb through my hair and make sure I hadn't spilled something on my shirt front? Nah.
Don't think so.
  My daughter had a camera on our computer for a while. It was an amusing novelty, but eventually it disappeared. I don't know what happened to it; I'll have to ask.

[Ella Gibbons]

I have never liked phones, and I certainly would never use a video phone.

I do call folks once inawhile to see if they are still alive and to remind them that I am, but it is not very often.

I cannot understand texting either.  What in the world do they say? 

I am getting more reclusive as I get older, which is/isn't a good/bad thing.

[Babi]

 ELLA, I'm simply thankful that this computer means we can stay in as much as we like or need,
and still interact with our friends and the rest of the world.

[Ella Gibbons]

Right, BABI, we are lucky to live in this age; to have discovered the joy of computers.  I have a couple of neighbors that I occasionally see and they know I have a computer.  They don't understand my interest! If I didn't love to read and discuss what I read, would I have a computer?   I don't know.

Why can you no longer use a phone if you don't mind my asking, BABI?

[nlhome]

The computer and a family cell phone contract mean that I can stay in touch with my children so much easier. My children used to email my parents when they were still alive, and that was so special - teens don't write letters or call their older relatives all that often, but email made it easy and fun for them. Now my children are young adults, still in contact with some of my remaining older aunts and others in our extended family. We've found other relatives that we've lost touch with because of Facebook.

[Babi]

Oh, I thought everybody here knew by now, ELLA. I lost the last of my
hearing during this past year. All I can hear now are noises that set
up vibrations or the noises in my head. 

[Ella Gibbons]

No, I didn't know, BABI.  Most of the people my age have some hearing loss -  I do.  I, too, have vibrations in my head, they seem to go all through my body and no doctor knows the reason.  It is probably the nerves in my ears dying.  Mercy, but it's age on my part.  All parts of me are falling prey to age.  Que Sara, que sara, - - how do you spell that old song, anyway?

[Babi]

Close, ELLA.  It's "Que sera, sera".  'Sera' means 'will be'.  What will be, will be.  Can't argue
with that one.

[pedln]

There are captioned phones now, and for me they are a necessity, as I might hear what someone is saying, but don't understand it. So I need to see the printed word.  I got the phone several years ago, without cost, from the state.  And, because I am busy reading what the caller or callee is saying, I don't multi-task.  (I would guess that any kind of sensory loss means less multi-tasking.)

I also use the computer for calling, courtesy of Sprint, who offers WebCApTel free of charge -- nice for traveling.  I use it with my cell phone, though any phone would work.  It's nice when you might want to print out a conversation (one-sided -- what the other guy says, not your words).

The disability people recently asked if I'd like a new updated captioned phone, but I turned them down because it was dependent on the computer, which would mean no phone when the computer is turned off, as it is whenever we have our frequent electrical storms.

[maryz]

My dear 90-year-old aunt (who lives in another state) is very deaf (but not completely) and has a problem with hand tremors.  We've tried to hard to get her involved in the computer, but she absolutely refused.  We finally gave up.  But her son found a device that hooks up to her phone that will receive and print out e-mail (sort of like a fax machine).  She cannot send, though.  He has it set up so that it will receive only from senders he approves (hence, no spam), and only downloads a couple of times a day (so no continuous noise).  It'll print out photographs, too.  She loves getting e-mails from her family and friends - and I send her a couple of photos a day.  It keeps her son hopping to be sure there is plenty of paper and ink in the machine.    The computer is terrific in keeping lines of communication open for the hearing impaired.

[Mippy]

Hi, everyone!
I just noticed this topic because Latin is on Spring Break!  Ginny
asked us what we would be doing this week ... haha ... as she always writes ... I'm doing some Latin but also reading more on the web than usual and in SeniorLearn.

I'd hate to do Skype, as I very often multitask while on in phone, these days often taking my little puppy out past the front door to his patch of grass for a rest stop.   My land line with a cordless handset works  outside.   Who'd want to have video of the dog going ....     

The best for us in our extended family is Facebook.   Photos of the
grandchildren go up often, so we can keep up with friends and family on a daily basis.  I love it!   And once in a while, I put up a photo of the puppy.

Texting is not all bad, by the way.  For example, my son-in-law used to text my daughter when he was on the commuter train (new job now, has to drive)  so she'd know how to plan their evening.   If you make a phone call on the train, which I did when I visited, everyone around you listens, in but if you text, it's private.   

[bellemere]

I once worked for an agency serving deaf people; most of them 'signed' and one thing I noteced was the animation in their faces as they did so.  I wrote to one of the girls,"I think you are an actress" and she answered,
Yes, I am an actress! " With her facial expressions she supplied the emphasis and emotion of her signed conversation.  Wonderful.
I tried to learn some ASL but only got to the very basics.  My deaf friends would often invite me to have lunch with them, but it would have meant stopping the flow of "conversation" they were having so that one or another of the verbal people could fill me in.  I usually thanked them for thinkint of me, but knew they would have more fun without me.
Babi,have you tried the TTY phone system? 
A couple of my deaf friends had cameras in their computers and could sign to othrs who could see them.  They loved that! They could even sign to an interpreter who then could speak their message to a non-signing person. 
 

[donnamo]

I'm all for technology and I am thrilled it has produced so many useful tools for people that want and need them, but personally, I hate talking on the phone.  I don't even like to talk to my husband on the phone because we always start speaking at the same time and I get frustrated.  We don't have a land line, so I always have my cell with me to take calls for appointments and such, and I text quite a bit keeping in touch with my daughter. 

I realize there are many people who need to physically talk to be well mentally and emotionally, but I'm one that needs to write type, and I get that emotional release through blogging, another type of cyber communication.  I began blogging in 2003, then Facebook came along and that filled another need, so I quit blogging.  Friends and family were keeping up with me on my blog, but I had no way to keep up with the day to day goings on with them - until Facebook. Now I've come to the place of being weary of being on Facebook every day, so I have dusted off my blog and resumed writing there once again.

We each have to decide for ourselves what is "too much" when it comes to communication, and learn to turn off and tune out when the bad starts outweighing the good.  I've done that very thing this week. 

I'm enjoying reading the viewpoints on this thread. 

[maryz]

Hi Donna, and welcome.  We love having new voices chime in.

[ginny]

We sure do, welcome, Donna! I'm in agreement with a lot of your thoughts. We do have to agree when too much is too much, I am so guilty of not answering the phone. I wonder if that dates me.

Remember the old Life With Father TV show? When they put a phone in the house? He would be outraged when it rang hahahaa. I always consider it an option not a summons.

Of course I explained to the helpful charity worker calling for me to mail out 10 envelopes of solicitation to my neighbors that I was on the Do Not Call List and he explained that as a charity they could call as they pleased.

So I get to answer as I please i guess. sigh.

Thank you all for your great posts here, I have enjoyed reading them. I  know nothing of Skype but I think it would change the way I dressed, I know it would, for casual phone calls, (not to family I can well imagine what a wonderful thing that is if family are away) but a phone solicitor or typing here? Maybe not.

I always learn so much from these discussions. Now the newest thing in the news is SALT, one of the oldest precious commodities known to man, think  about all of the sayings you know which involve salt and see if we left out any  here: http://seniorlearn.org/forum/index.php?topic=1236.msg65908#msg65908 and come on over and give us your opinions!

This discussion is now closed but thank you for your input~!